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Friday, November 25, 2005


© 2006 Mark Robert Gates

There comes a time in your life, when you have to step up, and take the bull by the horns and take charge of your life. When being babysat gets old, and clinging to scraps of a life that crashed and burned, cannot get you, to anywhere you desire to go. You, then mark that spot, and move on, to another, one step at a time. Then, while you begin to stand up for yourself, inside, and return to caring about yourself, you find a you worth loving, and begin to give the painful gift of yourself to others.

I was always concerned about others, and apathetic about what happened to me. Lost along the way, was a self, I could stand up for and champion. Now, I know we are supposed to be humble, and that the mighty are low, and the low are mighty, however, the nonexistant cannot be. My life has to be worthy of my own respect, and I will not allow myself to waste away, with no self-respect. I must now pick up where I left off, when my zeal of youth failed, and turned me out into the world all alone.

I now realize, I need the other people in the world, for my life, to have meaning. As I begin to find friends again, and feel love for others, I must place myself into those roles as being of importance. I must be open and honest, and unmask my feelings, in order to have myself known. I find as I do so more, there are, also, more who love and know me. Then those who love and know me, become people, I know and love, and strangers on a bus with glaring looks, do not matter any more. I can have no time for people so judgemental, they believe they know a person, just by looking. I must remove myself from having to be, whatever, those strangers believe me to be, and become, only, who I am, to myself and friends. Then those, I show myself to, will know, I am another person, who can be trusted not to change how I feel, because of a dirty look.

I am worthy of love, trust and admiration, we all are.

1 comment:

Willow Rhiamon said...

yes, you are very worthy. I am glad that you see that. Oh by the way, don't forget to set your comments so that people have to "word verify" to post. Otherwise you get posting spam. I was hit with a lot of it before I turned that on.